Category: Gibbering Idiot Thoughts

We’re Back – An Empty Promise’s Story

Hello and how the hell are you fine folk? Wow. It’s been a while since the last time I, the Boozy Barrister, attempted to restart this site up to talk about law, lawyering, legal things, etc. etc. etc. To the extent that, as I write the words “The site is coming back on February 1, 2021” each and every one of you are staring at the screen and sighing heavily with the belief that this is yet another empty promise. And you know what?

You may be right. But unlike the prior times I’ve sworn like a drug addict giving up the needle that this is the time it sticks, I’m trying my damndest this time. I mean that in the way that I’m not going to start making pie-in-the-sky promises about updating three times a week or anything like that. Because I know I won’t. As the ancient Greeks used to say: “Know thyself,” and MYself is prone to getting distracted, down, depressed, sluggish, and intensely focused on case work and therefore unable to dedicate the time I had back when my office was staffed up to the hilt to writing my thoughts down on these things.

But I’m gonna try, and I’m gonna try by saying that from here on out you can expect a post from me EVERY MONDAY unless I advise you well in advance. A little missive from the drunken whiskey glass/sentient comedian badger/overworked lawyer to start the week off. Always written on a Sunday night, in fact, so I can make sure it actually is done before I wrap myself in bed and dream about all the money I’ll never make hacking away at nickel and dime lawsuits. Because, to be honest, I miss it. And by setting myself ONE comprehensive post a week at the least, I can dedicate several days to writing it.

So here’s hoping it works.

Other things that are going on?

  • Monday Nights at 7 PM Eastern I’ll be over on Twitch streaming a roundup of whatever legal matter has caught my attention for an hour with a show I’m calling “Boozy’s Legal Funhouse.” You’ll be able to tune in at 7 PM Eastern HERE.
  • Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday I’ll be over at that same Twitch stream in my screaming persona of a giant badger man doing video games for an hour at the same time and generally chatting.
  • I’m sitting down this year to actually try and finally write “Boozy’s Guide to Law for Dipshits,” a book that I’d love to actually get done.

All that said and done, if you’re still here I want to thank you for reading through all of this. I’ll be back again next week. So long as I don’t get distracted.

Peace.

-BB

Like An Old Bra, I Have No Support.

Welcome back to another week of wonderful wastrels in the practice of law! I’m your host, the Boozy Barrister, and this here is the grand return of Lawyers & Liquor to the World Wide Web. I’d like to take a moment today and speak about the thing that’s been on the forefront of my mind over the past few months as I’ve drowned in a sea of manila folders and legal pads, and that’s the importance of support staff on your law practice. More importantly, what happens when you go the better part of a year without any support staff, and how this is a neverending nightmare of administrative tasks that suck away every moment of an attorney’s day.

Kind of appropriate that we’re having this little talk about the same time as Administrative Professionals Day, eh? Speaking of which, that would be on April 24th, this upcoming Wednesday, so make sure to get your secretary, receptionist, or that cranky elderly paralegal that looks at you like you’re a lower life form to be scraped off their fashionable flats something nice. May I suggest you forego the flowers and card and just buy them a nice wine, then give them permission to drink it at their desk? Otherwise…well…

You might end up like me.

Continue reading “Like An Old Bra, I Have No Support.”

We’re Back! A Lawyer’s Story

Holy hell it has been a while.  Let me take a minute and explain the long absence of the site, which is something that seems to be happening more and more often.

I work at a small office.  This small firm has recently had some significant staff turnovers, including my paralegal and secretary, which means that my workload has significantly increased.  As such, I’ve spent the past couple months putting out fire after fire as it rages through the pile of manila folders on the corner of my desk.  However, unlike Rome under Nero, I’ve finally got that raging inferno under control!  As a result, we’re finally ready to return to the regular updates here starting on Wednesday with a bullet in the chamber of our legal gun.

Thank you all for your patience on this!

An Open Letter To My Neighbor About Their Fireworks

Dear Neighbor,

Hello. You probably know me as the angry looking guy with a cane you tend to see furtively smoking cigarettes in his porch chair while wearing a suit in the late evening hours. You often may ask yourself “why is he always wearing a suit” and “why do I never see him before 7 p.m. at night?” The answer to that question is that I’m an attorney, and I tend to get up pretty early in the morning to head to my office. I also only really return home at night after all my work is done. You see, it isn’t that I’m not sociable, it’s just that I’m tired and those early evening hours, when I’m sitting on the porch and enjoying a glass of whiskey and some nicotine, are about the only quiet moments I get in a life full of kids, dogs, and legal nonsense from other people in the area.

And that’s sort of why I want to talk to you today, because, see, getting up early in the morning and stuff tends to mean that I go to bed early at night. Like, not at 7:30 p.m. or something, but at a respectable hour. You know, maybe 9:30 or 10:00. Not “Grandma’s bed time” but not too far off. Early to bed and early to rise and all that. Even my pooches go to bed early, heading to their dog beds not long after me. Except, lately, I’ve been finding it to be hard to get to sleep at night. Because it’s summer, and you’ve found out the fireworks stands are open.

Continue reading “An Open Letter To My Neighbor About Their Fireworks”