Welcome to another beautiful week here in the wide world of litigation and small firm chicanery. I’m the Boozy Barrister, your guide through the minor hell that is the day-to-day practice of law in the real world, and this is Lawyers & Liquor, the internet’s equivalent of an overflowing septic tank of cynicism and legal ramblings.
You know what I hate? You know what really gets under my fucking skin and makes me see red, white and blue (because even my fuckin’ anger is patriotic as shit)? Those goddamn letters that you get from opposing counsel in a case where they spend the whole goddamn time posturing and pissing on you, blowing themselves up more often than a remedial school for suicide bombers. These letters are the legal equivalent of two pussywillow thin frat boys standing on opposite sides of a room and screaming “Come at me bro” while not struggling very goddamn hard to get out of the grips of Teddy and Chugs (named for his particular skill) because goddamn if that happened there may be a real fight. It’s a lot of chest-pounding with little to no payoff and they are goddamn ridiculous pieces of a puffery that every lawyer sees right through.
Continue reading ““CC: Client” – The Worst Form of Posturing”
Hey guys, we’re back for Part 2 of the Fetish Friday this week, and before we start doing a wrist deep dive into the world of Adult Baby/Diaper Lover Litigation, let me first apologize for my absence this week. I’ve been busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest over the past week, rubbing hither and yonder to take care of some personal shit as well as juggling my case load, and it got in the way of getting this stuff out when I was planning to. sincere apologies.
So, if you weren’t around last time, know that I started talking about Adult Baby/Diaper Lovers, a community shorthanded into “AB/DL,” and giving a brief overview of exactly what the hell that is. But I’m not going to do that again here, because I don’t have the time of the inclination to spend an hour rehashing a post that’s already in existence. Click back through and read that shit, okay?
The reason for that whole thing was, very recently, a lawsuit was filed by one maker of adult diapers against another, and it wasn’t about moving into the pull-ups line, turning off Thomas the Tank Engine, of anything of that nature. Rather, it was a lawsuit about…trademark infringement. And that brings up an interesting question: Do they have a case, or are they just being big babies about all of this?
Continue reading “Fetish Friday: Trademark Infringement and the ABDL Community, Part 2”
So I have clients that are…less than thrilled with the amount of my recent bill.
“But we just paid $2,000! Why do we have to pay another $2,000 this month?”
“Because you told me to be aggressive and refuse settlement offers to bring this matter to trial. That’s the cost of me doing this.”
“You didn’t tell us that!”
Followed by me responding with every email that contains one key phrase:
“Litigation is expensive. It is not unheard of for a case going to trial to cost thousands of dollars a month while we are in active discovery, nor is it uncommon for the price tag of the entire matter to range in the tens of thousands of dollars. It is my suggestion that we reach out to discuss a possibility of settlement once we have conferred regarding what an appropriate settlement amount would be.”
This is a regular thing. It’s almost the hallmark of an hourly civil litigator to have to remind their clients of that one key thing: Litigation is fucking expensive.
Continue reading “Litigation is Expensive, Buddy: A dialogue with the “Righteous Client””